Understanding Betrayal Trauma from Infidelity: A Comprehensive Guide

Nothing can tear a relationship apart like infidelity.  It can be a sexual affair, an emotional affair, flirting, use of pornography, or any other way in which one partner feels their trust has been betrayed by the other.  Because, at its core, the pain of infidelity comes from a betrayal of trust.  And it can make the best relationship feel broken and full of despair.

Here’s how couples therapy for betrayal can help you and your partner come together even stronger than before.

Before

Your relationship has been shaken by a boundary violation, betrayal, or infidelity.  You feel devastated, embarrassed, and confused by this deep wound, but afraid to talk about the betrayal without help because the feelings are so big.  You aren’t sure how your relationship can be repaired, but you want to understand how you got here and where to go next.

After

You are taking tangible steps toward rebuilding trust and honesty. You’re clear on your relationship needs and feel confident in how to navigate different wants. You understand how your relationship became vulnerable to betrayal. Now you’re better communicators, more open with each other, and feel more confident in your path ahead.

Before

You betrayed your partner and are drowning in shame.  You love your spouse, but are unsure if they are meeting your needs, are the person for you, or if you want to continue in your relationship.  Your questioning why did you step outside your relationship and what does it mean. 

After

You understanding what motivated you to step outside your relationship.  You feel confident in the person you are and will not let the shame define who you are.  Understanding the reason for your infidelity gives you clarity and confidence in what direction to go for the future.

Before

You have been shocked by a betrayal and do not know how to move forward.  The feeling of the betrayal are so overwhelming, you have to either push them away or they take over.  You cannot figure out if this is something you can recover from in your relationship.

After

You feel in control of the strong emotions you have in response to a betrayal.  You did the hard work of processing the feelings, understanding the betrayal, and figuring out who you are now.  Talking about your relationship doesn’t feel scary and it the betrayal does not define you.

Infidelity can feel like an impossible hurdle, but with the right support, you and your partner can heal and rebuild trust.

Therapy provides a safe space to understand the underlying causes of betrayal and to communicate openly. If you’re ready to take the next step toward recovery and a stronger relationship, schedule a session today and start the journey toward healing together.